The Day I Talked to God and HE TALKED TO ME BACK!

Through her connections with famous Hollywood directors, Sallie had been able to hook me up with an interview I knew I would never forget. He met the qualifications required for the interview project... in that he was old. And that I didn't know him personally beforehand. I had called earlier to set up the interview. I had talked to his secretary - he himself was much too busy to be answering phones. I drove to one of his mansions, convenienly located in Decatur, GA. The door to the parking garage opened as I drove up to it, almost as if it knew I was coming.
"It's almost as if the garage door knew I was coming," I thought to myself.
I got out of my car and walked into the lobby.
"M-mister Freeman will s-see you now," the secretary stuttered at me. Then she burped. Then she blushed, because she had burped in public. Than she burped again. I turned in the direction she had pointed me. There were stairs that led upwards. A sign pointed me to "God's room". I was intimidated adn excited at the same time, to be interviewing God. I kept walking.
"S-sorry." A man had staggered past me on his way downstairs, and nearly knocked me over.
"It's fine." I muttered, and kept walking. I passed a women sitting down against the stairwell, holding her head. I was astounded. God's workers were all drunk! "Oh my GOD, his workers are all inebriated!" I thought to myself.
I reached the top of the stairwell. I knew this was it. Armed with my Ipod and Camisia's recording device, I opened the door, and walked inside. There he was, sitting at his desk. God. he looked up at me and smiled.
"Hello."
It struck me with the force of a monstrous wave. My knees felt weak. My vision was blurred. I sat down in the chair across from him. I was determined to make this interview awesome, so Sallie's senior project wouldn't suck.
"What is your name?" I asked, even though I already knew it, even though the world already knew it.
"I am Morgan Freeman." I fainted.
Weeks later, when I was working at his office, they would tell me I was a lightweight. Most pass out after a few sentences. One boasted that he had gotten through 6.5. On TV, in movies, the voice makes you laugh, it makes you cry, it makes Jacob's mom cry, it calms you, soothes you, re-vitalizes you, and makes you believe in God. in person, Morgan Freeman's voice gets you drunk. Instantly drunk. For me, it had taken 5 words: "Hello, I am Morgan Freeman."